(Helmut Newton)

2010

is

coming.

This year shall be profound.

JouJou Loves You

Even when you are a smoking gun, people want to see..... something else. They need you to be something else to them, so they try to mold and shape. Or else they just do it quietly which makes you think they are even more nuts. Or they judge because you are not living life according to their standards and desires.

I'm young, single, no children, and I live my life accordingly. Damn it is a great life.

That is why I stay away from these people. About 99.9% of it is men wanting something more than I am willing to give.

It is hilarious the kind of cray cray that comes out when they realize that you won't bend to their will. Or hell, even when you refuse to go on a date. I just stand back and watch, listen, let them make a fool of themselves.

It really is quite entertaining.

When you feel like you have to fight to be yourself....it is probably not an ideal pairing. This has happened to me in the past and I didn't always end it when I should have.

No more of that.

Now I have a ZERO tolerance policy.

I'm going to state a disclaimer for all the crazies out there...you know who you are.

Just because I write something on my blog, doesn't mean it is going on in my life RIGHT at this moment, or happened in real life. I'm a writer, a storyteller and a grand lover of Erotica. I'm a bonafide pervert. Remember that.

And I say all of this with love!!! Always love. I like to spread love and happiness always.

So enough of that nonsense.

Life is beautiful, grand, and the most glorious thing I have ever encountered. The time is now to make things happen, to love, to attain, OBTAIN!!! Prends, Prends!! Maintenant!! Le MAXIMUM!!!!

I know I do.

JouJou Loves You

Things that stir my soul......

It still amazes me the perfection in time and space.

How phantom worlds really do exist if you want them to.....

The more I use my brush....the more beautiful this picture becomes.

JouJou Loves You

(Christian Fossati)

I dreamt last night that I was back in Africa.

Bizarre.

Then I dreamt about making love in hotel rooms. Again. But not just any hotel rooms. Decadent, elegant, wildly luxurious hotel rooms.

Foreshadowing perhaps?

God I hope so.

I went out last night and had a wildly entertaining time. It seems champagne with beautiful people is breeding ground for decadence and incessant giggles. Everything feels so amazing, so grand, so brimming with life that I find myself jumping for joy. Literally.

I feel recharged. Reminded of things that I had forgotten along the way. I forgot that I could feel this way. The excitement, the familiarity. It frightens and pulls me in so vehemently that I don’t even try to fight any of it. It is frightening because a part of me is left with things that cannot be explained. I know that I shouldn’t need them explained, but that doesn’t change the fact that I want to know where they all came from.

Certain people were so missed. People who have known me for most of my life. We talked, laughed, reminisced. I didn’t want the moments to end, but at the back of my mind I knew that those days had been temporary ones. They will go back to their lives and I will surely go back to mine. But do I want to? The simplicity at home dances for me in such a way that I can do nothing but keep watching, wanting. I had simplicity in a far away land….but it wasn’t enough. So I left and found grandeur and excitement laced with little complications that leave you feeling alive.

I long for that life very rarely, but when I do, it pains. These past 2 and a half months have left me feeling intoxicated.

I often feel as if I am in a dream state and none of it is really real. But isn’t that life in itself? Isn’t this a dream? A movie that we play in? A journey of adjustments and realizations. Catalysts, antagonists, protagonists…a beginning, middle, and end? I finally learned how to direct, to cut and edit, and most of all….to capture the footage that shall be my masterpiece.

This place here, this existence is cumbersome. Drags us down, gives an impossible weight to everything. It is our job, our duty to ourselves to find our weightlessness. To float and to rise higher and higher.

I feel like I have finally found that...the thing that makes me rise higher and higher.

It is me.

JouJou Loves You

I want to feed this to my lover while we are laying in bed.

JouJou Loves You

I laid on your chest as if it were the first time.

As if it were the first time with anyone, anywhere.

Your silence made me wet.

Knowing me as you always have, you took me without any words. Without any warning.

I let you.

I couldn't get close enough to you and I couldn't catch my breath. I tore at your hair, your skin.

I devoured your body.

I thought I had known desire, I thought that desire and I had become quite close.

This was something else entirely.

Damn you.

And damn this love.

JouJou Loves You

I went back to the place where I grew up.

It was amazing.

I saw so many old faces that became new again. Childhood friends, my precious family....

I feel recharged. I feel full.

I love getting what I need.

What a gift.

JouJou Loves You